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Joy's Obituary

On Friday, July 1st, 2011, our Angel went home.

 We wish we could have kept her with us but it was not to be.

 Joy Styles-Kukec (nee Christensen) was born in Wainwright on April 15^th, 1959 and is predeceased by her mother, Opal Christensen (nee Ebbesen), her father, Martin Christensen, Lance Styles, aunts, uncles and various loved ones.

Joy is survived by her loving husband, Carl Kukec and children, Lauren and Gil Marin, Ryan and Chris Kukec, sister Lorraine and Bob Dykstra and family, Bruce and Linda Christensen and family and Mike and Lois Christensen and family. Uncle George and Jackie Ebbesen and family and many cousins, nieces, nephews

She asked that rather than grieve, we celebrate her life and remember her for the laughter, the love and the joy that she brought to all of us.

 A memorial for Joy Styles-Kukec in celebration of her life will be held

on Saturday, July 9th between 12pm and 5pm at the Blackfoot Inn

in the Heritage Room and adjoining Lobby Lounge.

 In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to the ALS Society of

Alberta.  Further information is available on the website at: www.hopeforjoy.ca

Carl's Tribute to Joy:

Thank you all for coming ... this is something that I had never imagined I would ever need to write, please indulge me as I read it for the most part ... to keep from going too far astray with emotion ... it is a love letter of sorts, parting words for Joy ... my best friend, my soul mate, the love of my life!

My Dearest Joy ... Mi Querida:

The last thing on my mind as my head hits the pillow is a vision of a smiling you ... as is the first thing when I open my eyes in the early light of the morning dawn ... I turn my head ever so slightly, and the harsh reality that is the day begins to sink in.

It is not that I am without limb that so handicaps the days since your passing; rather it is the room that no longer radiates with your smile, it is the room no longer bathed in the love lurking behind those beautiful expressive eyes ... for now maybe, absent is the promise of joy-filled days ... days that were shared without inhibition or restraint ... as can attest pretty much anyone who has been graced by your presence.

From the moment we fell into each others arms there has not been a time that our hearts and thoughts have not been completely intertwined, on every possible level we seemed to share a an intuitive connection ... rooted in a love that cares more for the other, than for oneself ... as long as the other was happy, whether near or afar, whether alone or in the presence of others, without guilt or regret, no judgement or remorse ... we were secure in our love, to come and go, and to grow ... knowing home was always at hand ... not to say we did not have our differences; yet it was in the differences that we grew, individually and as one ...  never doubting that our life together was meant to be celebrated, with no strings attached.

Too few months ago in November, we were wed under the Mayan sun ... in our hearts we were always secure in the sacredness of our bond, no paper required ... we completed each other in a way that could not be reduced to mere words ... you were absolutely the most beautiful bride I could ever have wished for ... on a stunningly ambient day, that anyone who was so privileged to attend, will not soon forget.

The name thing was an aside, which neither of us put much importance on ... but I must admit I so loved it when you called yourself Mrs. Kukec, and the smile it put on your face when others did; and occasionally I got a Mr. Styles, and that too made us chuckle ... alas the challenges of the journey were too much to follow through on, though a mere formality that would have been required ... it was enough that our hearts recognized that you were mine and I was yours, forever and always, indivisibly so. I tended to brag that I had the best partner in you, a guy in a woman's body, all the benefits but without guy hang-ups.

The tears of joy that were shed on that day November day, we share again here today ... and though I feel lost without you Joy, and though I am desperate to be with you again ... I know unequivocally, that you want nothing more than to hear me laugh now and always, to see me love sooner than later, and to help me embrace life fully and completely yet again ... though, easier said than done ... but in keeping with your iLiveLifeLarge proviso I undertake to do my best, in your honor ... thus I will embrace dancing in the rain with Joy-like gusto, and I will lift my head up knowingly ... to feel the warmth of your heavenly glow.

For all these beautiful people that have gathered here today; and for all those who have written because they could not personally attend; for your most loving and caring family, for you immense network of friends, co-workers, acquaintances and admirers; for my kids who you so embraced as their own, and they you; for my entire family who were touched in ways they have never before experienced, even extending the same grace and love to my former wife and in-laws, and they you ... I speak for all of us that you have been a god-send in the truest and purest form, our angel of Joy.

And these past two years, however daunting and challenging they were, have in a way been the most magical of all ... so much life in such a short period, you/we never shrank from living to the fullest ... until finally we could do it no more ... at times I know I could have been more (awake that is), but never did I waiver in my love, nor in will to care for you no matter what ... I would have gladly chosen to remain on this path with you for the rest of my life, had you not had to suffer and struggle ... as would have Lauren and Gil in every which way ... we made an amazing foursome in Mexico, as well as here ... it was our dream, to be in Mexico of course ... and I will return with you in my heart and see where the journey takes me ... with peace of mind knowing that one day it will take me back to you ...watch for me under the Mexican sun, on Mexican time, as I do a half turn to catch your smile, la Media Vuelta ... mi querida para siempre.

Joy you are in everything I do, the essence of my being is without measure completely and utterly for you.

I love you eternally, this is not adieu.